"Yes," he answered without hesitation, "yes...it was not a matter of not
loving you enough to look at either of you, but the pain of having to
choose. I..." He stumbles on his words unsure of how to explain himself.
"For so long my heart was sealed in a box and locked tightly away. And then
not one but two people....found their way inside that box and unlocked it.
I was...afraid at the depth of my feelings for both of you...I had never
been in love before...love was not even something I had even considered.
after my family died."
He picks up a piece of his gun and toys with it, needing something in his
hands as he speaks. "It hurt when Vax chose Keyleth...and yet there was
relief as well. My feelings for him could fade away and never be spoken of
ever. I knew I could love him quietly and never have to choose between you.
I felt guilty enough after what I did...to you that letting the rift remain
was easy between your brother and I."
He looks at her pain clearly written over his face. "And I will never speak
to him about my feelings...he has been hurt enough by me....why burden him
with something that will cause more of that." He begins putting the gun
back together with a speed that speaks of doing so many many times. "And
now I've lost you as well...something I've always been afraid of
happening...perhaps my heart was never meant to come out of that box...."
no subject
"Yes," he answered without hesitation, "yes...it was not a matter of not loving you enough to look at either of you, but the pain of having to choose. I..." He stumbles on his words unsure of how to explain himself. "For so long my heart was sealed in a box and locked tightly away. And then not one but two people....found their way inside that box and unlocked it. I was...afraid at the depth of my feelings for both of you...I had never been in love before...love was not even something I had even considered. after my family died."
He picks up a piece of his gun and toys with it, needing something in his hands as he speaks. "It hurt when Vax chose Keyleth...and yet there was relief as well. My feelings for him could fade away and never be spoken of ever. I knew I could love him quietly and never have to choose between you. I felt guilty enough after what I did...to you that letting the rift remain was easy between your brother and I."
He looks at her pain clearly written over his face. "And I will never speak to him about my feelings...he has been hurt enough by me....why burden him with something that will cause more of that." He begins putting the gun back together with a speed that speaks of doing so many many times. "And now I've lost you as well...something I've always been afraid of happening...perhaps my heart was never meant to come out of that box...."